This is Part II of a special post by guest blogger Kevin Rains owner of Center City Collision in Cincinnati, Ohio and founder of Body Shop 2.0 (bodyshopmarketingplan.com).

“Let everyone be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger.”

I am convinced there’s a whole universe worth of strategy in that ancient saying.  I don’t care who you are, what your role in life is, or what position or titles you hold.  That advice applies to you. And, if followed, it will do you a world of good.  It will bring you healthy relationships and treasures in every sense of the word.

  • If you are a mom trying to get through to your daughter, this applies.
  • If you are a CEO hoping your partners will finally “get it”, this applies.
  • If you are a new manager and can’t figure out why your direct reports won’t respect you, this applies.
  • If you are a salesperson and you find you are no longer closing deals the way you used to, this applies.
  • If you are husband and you feel like you’re losing touch with your wife, this applies.

For whatever reason, we are convinced that talking at problems will fix them and giving people more information will influence them.  Wrong!  What works is showing you care by genuinely listening to them.  Listening earns you the right to influence them.  It is the price of admission to even have the conversation.

Listening well takes work and practice and learning.  But it can be learned and to be really effective in any endeavor it must be learned.

I fully agree with John Jantsch, “…one of the master skills of any marketer, manager or educator is the ability to listen perceptively to what our prospects, customers, staff and community members are saying.  And I further believe this is something we all have to work at.” (The Commitment Engine, p 152)

Here’s a couple of great resources to get you started…

A book:  Just Listen: Discover the Secret to Getting Through to Absolutely Anyone by Mark Goulston

A video:  Ernesto Sirolli: Want to help someone? Shut up and listen!